Archive for September, 2007

Today I went to big man’s work for lunch. He works at the uni and they have cheap, good lunches there. Lunch was fine then a former colleague came in with her 10 month boy.. then some one else joined us, and before I knew it we were being congratulated left and right.

I love attention dont get me wrong, but it’s just really scary having everyone saying things to us. It’s nice, really nice, but now i feel the pressure. If something should go wrong, and Goddess forbid, then the pressure is on. Everyone knows.. really it’s getting to where everyone knows. We will be okay.. we’re just nervous…


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Here you all go, our little guy, in his fuzzy glory! Enjoy!

Pupo at 20 weeks

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He is measuring just perfect at 20 weeks, and was moving around like a crazy person! 🙂 She wasn’t that patient and didn’t look at the sex, but honestly we’d be happy with either boy or girl.

He was doing some thumb sucking again and some knee sucking or toe sucking ( my little pervert ), and it was great to see.

Now we can start to tell everyone.. i swear i will  start to tell more strangers in the streets than ever before! 🙂

Oh and my placenta is on the front wall, which is maybe why I am not feeling him as much.. I will be patient!

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THE big, 20 week scan is later today, and I am nervous. Yes, things were okay just 3 little weeks ago, my how time ticks slowly by… but still, I worry. Big man thinks he felt a tiny kick against his hand yesterday when we were lying very vewy still.

 i thought I felt little flutters all day yesterday, but nothing so far today 😦 One of my student’s had a baby, 3 months early, at week 26 to be exact. I can’t imagine having this new little creature in our life in just 6 weeks. I hope to Goddess he won’t come THAT early!

 You think once you’ve been an infertile, that once you get pregnant, all your worries are over, that’s it, you are a prego one. But alas, that seems to be bullshit. I worry all the time. I worry in my sleep, I think about pupo all the time, what will he be like, who will he look like etc.. It’s a miracle I can still function and do some other things.. really it is!

 I noticed on my previous haunting ground, the ivillage ivf friends and support page.. i have to laugh, as the bitches there, hardly ever offered support, and were very quick to judge should i not agree with something, but i diverge..anyway, a woman who got pg on her first ivf, ONLY to miscarry at 8 weeks, recently did her 2nd ivf and is prego again.

 Cudos for her, but I noticed, not even being 7 weeks, she already has this huge sig block with tickers and baby pics and all that crap. Again, I AM happy for her, but considering her first miscarriage, and i have been there.. i know.. i think it’s presumptious and quite silly to be boasting about this pregnancy when she hasn’t even passed the ‘critical’ time. I am such a bitch, right*?

 Frankly, i don’t care, but I think it’s silly. Like the only reason she can survive is to post that shit on her sig block.. otherwise it’s this ‘sad’ pic of her with her man and their dog. As if that isn’t life enough. What if she looses this one? What will her life be then I wonder? I dont’ know her, nor do i care to, but the simple fact is, there HAS to be more in life than the baby quest. There just HAS to be more to keep you going.. cause if we fail.. we are fucked!

 thanks and wish me luck!

20w today..

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I had a dream my mom did IVF just to try it and got pg. It was really early on. I then went to get an ultrasound as we couldn’t find the heartbeat at our nightly check. The dr said that the baby measured exactly 18 weeks something.. but that there was no heartbeat now. It died between our morning and evening check.

I couldn’t go back to sleep after that. I felt horrible! I’ve never had a scary baby dream like that before, so that sucks. I just hope everything is okay. Time ticks by slowly and we still hear beating.. so lets hope..

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She called me last night. She is 25 and has had some health issues in the passed, including 2 early m/c around 8 weeks a few years ago.

She called in the middle of my only work in the week, and said she was at the emergency room last night vomiting etc.. they asked if she could be pg and she said probably not.. but they did some blood beta tests..

Turns out she is 3+ months. That  means when we were in Portland at their place, we were BOTH pregnant, how funny is that??

Big man and I are very excited for them. They are so different than us. They haven’t even seen or heard a heartbeat and have already told EVERYONE, even people we haven’t told yet.. to each his own right.. I am just superstitious I guess.

LEt’s hope it’s all okay for everyone..

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Yes, Oulu is a strange place. Very far up north, yes, but still managed to make cnn headlines 🙂 Enjoy!


OULU, Finland (AP) — A Japanese man out-“played” challengers to win the Air Guitar World Championship for the second consecutive year at a contest in northern Finland.


Japan’s Ochi Yusuke does his thing on stage in Finland.

Ochi Yosuke received the highest score from a panel of judges in the final late Friday at the Teatria rock club in Oulu, near the Arctic Circle.

Apart from the glory, he received a custom-made Flying Finn electric guitar worth $3,400.

The talent on display was variable at best. The surprise of the qualifying round was Oulu native Hilkka “Gore Kitty” Suvanto, who has twice before scored the lowest points ever in that round but now achieved a perfect six from many of the judges.

However, it was Ochi who impressed the judges the most in the final showdown, ahead of Guillaume “Moche Pitt” de Tonquedec, of France, and Austria’s Max “Herr Jaquelin” Heller.

“It’s great. We’ve seen all the nations, united nations, ‘rocking on the free world’ and that’s good, that’s great,” de Tonquedec said.

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