Archive for February, 2008

Love being a mom!

Without sounding like some smug bitch, I have to say that I LOVE LOVE being a mom. Ms. Negative said once her little boy arrived that there is nothing like looking into his eyes. That comment really hit me the other night. Just looking into his eyes, he blinks, makes me think he understands me just brings me to tears.

My while I was pregnant favorite song was Ship song by Nick Cave and hearing that today whilst changing his diaper just brought me to my knees. Just looking at this little man that was so wanted, so loved from the beginning of time it seems.

I know everyone says don’t give up, but I could never imagine being this lucky. From 3 failed IUIs, 2 failed full IVF cycles and this being a FET, with bleeding, Fuck we are lucky! And if I never have any other children, this would be enough. This feeling is amazing and it still humbles me to this day that he is here. Nearly 3 weeks on and he humbles me and leaves me speechless.

He has gained a bit of weight, and is now 2.80kg about 6.2lbs so growing slowly and eating readily when we wake him, and if anyone has any questions, do not hesitate to ask.

take care, here is our little guy.. already with a message to the world.  honestly, this is how he was feeding the other day!Eicca’s message to the masses


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We’re homeee…

Hi everyone, firstly I want to thank everyone for the comments and messages! You have no idea how comforting it was especially all last week alone in the hospital. I never expected to go in for a check-up and be admitted. I had dirty underwear on and dishes in the fucking sink…. and suddenly bam there for a week worrying about Eicca.

Marco could come every evening and would read me your comments and just knowing so many people around the world were thnking of us made it a bit easier. My days were spent crying, watching some tv and listening to Eicca’s heartbeat waiting for something from the doctors.

By the time Tuesday came the baby water was so low they decided to try to induce labor on Wednesday. The whole day Wed I was hooked up to pitocin and was waiting to dialate.. it didn’t happen. I hardly had any contractions. The drs came in, checked and said, nothing is happening so ‘we’ll see’ I flipped out.. We’ll see.. we’ll see for WHAT? He has no fluid.. she returned with 7 people.. interns, students and drs alike..

And one saw that I was ‘mentally not handling it well’ and suggested an ultra sound Thursday. Then Thursday after a number of detailed ultras, they noticed he not only didn’t have any fluid, but for some reason he was really small, about the size of 36 weeks gestation, when he should have been 38. She thought it was best to just do the c-section on Friday.

In principal that was it, and after 6 days in the hosptial, more crying and more nerves when his weight not only dropped like normal babies, but also he gained some then dropped again. Plus they fucking had me labeled diabetic, which I am not, and therefor he had to have his glucose checked daily, twice daily, and his little feet look like someone took a knife to them, and of course he doesn’t have ‘my’ diabetes.. fucking idiots.

But the dr had run also a million other blood tests, including watching his liver function as he turned a bit yellower by the day, but those tests too came back okay. All in all, we are so glad to be home. We have to feed him every 3 hrs, and each feeding lasts one hour, first breasts, then breast milk from the bottle or formula just a bit to help him get more in.

He is just a very sleepy eater and never cries for food. Really he would be fine sleeping through the night, and does about 4 hrs if we forget to wake up.. which we try not to do. So far the animals seem curious. but not dangerous yet.. we’ll watch it.

Enjoy the pics, and thank you all so much for the lovin. Apologies if I don’t write much in the next few days, but we do love you all so much and are so happy to have our Eicca Francis Morgoth home. Btw, Eicca is pronounced Ay-Kah in case anyone didn’t know. My family still can’t get it exactly right, but you all will learn.. we love you anyway!! 🙂

Take care,
Regina, Marco, Eicca and pets

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