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Archive for the ‘BFN’ Category

From BFP to BFFN.. WTF!!!!

I don’t know what happened, or if something happened. I am still symptomless, just cramping. Took the test from the drs office today, but was missing the instructions.

Still it was a clear negative.

Dr. Riitta said it’s now time to come in for a BETA blood test. Results in tomorrow.. she said we have 50/50 chance. Let’s see…

Is that even possible?

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14dp2dt pics

Now what??test 4

test 5

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12dp2dt BFFN…

need I say more?

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Sitting here crying, i went to pee and had some brown spotting when I wipe. Sorry if TMI, I am devastated. Called big man, he is really sad too. Sent email to dr, it’s just freaking 10 dp2dt, what the FUCK! It’s too early to get my period. I’m trying to read those boards with those positive posts. Brown never seems to be bad, but when our first one failed, I had brown, really early too, same time actually, 10dp, so who knows.

I feel it’s over. I feel sad and empty and almost at the end of this ttc rope. But, I know we will go further and we are strong enough to go further, it just doesn’t feel that way right now.

Right now I have to work, a lot and get some shit finished, and I know this failed and I am cramping and it sucks! IT FUCKING SUCKS!! We’ve done EVERYTHING right! EVERY FUCKING THING was done perfectly, so why the fuck isn’t this working….. 😦

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